Sirius-ly Sweltering

Laughter does not have to come from a major source. It could be ... relatively minor. ...

Welcome to the ‘dog days of summer’. You’ve probably noticed the endless, hot, humid weeks, certainly a “ruff” stretch if you’re in central Iowa (which we are).

(Illustration by Gemini)

The phrase’s origin lies in ancient astronomy and the star Sirius. No, not Siri, your phone’s voice assistant. Sirius is the Dog Star, the brightest in the Canis Major constellation. It’s funny that the Dog Star is the brightest star, because I know some dogs that weren’t the sharpest tools in the shed.

Fortunately, my two dogs aren’t among them. They’re from the Canis Minor constellation, a nod to the pun in the name of my column, but still canine: an Australian Shepherd and an Aussiedoodle. Both are intelligent enough to recognize a tennis ball when I throw it into the backyard, three for three. But they refuse to bring it back. Yep, I’m Sirius-ly referring to them.

And my dogs are smart enough not to go out into the intense heat, where you could fry an egg on the sidewalk. Well, probably because I don’t open the door to let them out. Even I am smart enough to know better. Who wants a couple of hot dogs? That would mean a trip to the store for buns and chips. They say, “It’s not the heat, it’s the humidity,” but why take a chance?

So until the dog days of summer are over and a cool autumn breeze finally rolls across Iowa, you will find the three of us right here, parked strategically in front of the central air-conditioning vent. I will keep tossing tennis balls down our long hallway, my two pups will look the other way, and we will patiently wait for sweater weather.

Stay cool out there. And if you actually fry an egg on the pavement, save me a quick bite.

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